by Warren Zevon/Waddy Wachtel/Leroy P. Marinell c. 1991 Zevon Music/BMI Don't bring the milk in Leave it on the porch Don't read the papers Don't mow the lawn no more Drive to the market At the break of dawn Watch 'em unload the produce Then ride right back home It's the white man's burden And it weighs a ton I'm a family man Model citizen Torment the mailman Terrorize the maid Try to teach 'em some manners Whip 'em into shape Down in the basement I've got a Craftsman lathe Show it to the children When they misbehave It's the white man's burden And it weighs a ton I'm a family man Model citizen I'm a law-abiding man I'm a good Samaritan I pay my taxes when I can Model citizen In the cool of the evening When the sun goes down My wife's playing canasta With everyone in town When I feel the pressure And I need a break Load up the Winnebago Drive it in the lake It's the white man's burden And it weighs a ton I'm a family man Model citizen
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