Emilie Autumn - Never Tasted Tears - Текст песни

I've never tasted tears 
Like these before 
And though they are the saddest 
I have known 
Their simple cause is none but 
One of joy 
For now it seems 
I may not be alone 
Upon this earth 
As I have been 'til now 
A truly unexpected twist of fate 
For I had given up 
On everyone 
Especially myself
And thought it late 
Too late
For any soul to cast a line 
His hook would hit the ice 
And snap in two 
But someone blew a kiss 
And with his breath 
Unfroze 
What ne'er a roaring fire could do 
An angel now is mine
And from the start 
I knew that I was bound to let him in 
But while I smile 
I weep 
Because I know 
That something ends 
So that this can begin 
God, what a fool am I
Or am I wise? 
For years have I kept hidden in my heart 
The name 
Of one who never had been more 
But whom I wrote about 
And set apart 
From other men
Though never did I tell 
My feelings, nay
But used him 
As a muse 
An inspiration
Something to adore 
But rarely did I think on what I'd lose
If ever 
My affections 
Were replaced 
By someone living
Breathing
Warm and real 
For while I pledged my life 
To him in song 
The same for me 
I knew he did not feel 
If I could tell the truth
I'd say I planned 
To go on in this fashion 
For all time 
I didn't care 
He couldn't care for me 
As long as I could own him 
In each rhyme 
And have someone to think about 
Each night 
When torment 
After torment wracked my soul 
To writhe in sorrow
Bathe in pain's delight 
To fill my pages 
Was my only goal 
Until the day 
I dared 
To call it love 
For this love 
Was the only I had known 
And somehow 
I could keep the rest away 
For in my mind 
I never was alone 
And being thus in love
Though with a specter
I never did expect
Nor wish
Nor care 
To take another 
In that holy place 
Though in my mind 
I knew no one was there 
Yay, in my mind
But not so in my soul 
I loved
I swear I loved
Else why this pain 
When of my will 
I opened up the door 
And swept the space 
Where I swore he'd remain
And something dies within me 
As I sweep 
As something new is born 
In every tear 
Past years of memories 
I long to keep 
A future 
That I both long for 
And fear 
There really was no question when it came 
This shooting star
Both fire and gentleness 
Who never gave me time 
To make my choice 
But made my will 
His own with each caress 
For once 
And only once 
I did not think 
Where I should feel 
And for that I was proud 
But it was one thing to enact the part 
And something else 
To say the word aloud 
For once I had
I felt 
A shadow fade 
Which over me had hung for all these years 
And no true loss 
In all the world could match 
The sense of someone 
Passing 
With my tears 
I hadn't known 'til then 
How lost I was 
Enveloped in this mist of my design 
So much of me 
My muse had thus become 
That in my eyes 
No star was seen to shine 
Unless it bore 
Some of my phantom's light 
Or carried strains of music in the beams 
Until my soul was open to the view 
No man could enter
Except in my dreams

It's over now 
And I am not afraid 
I know full well 
What I am meant to do 
But late at night 
When I recall my muse 
I cry for us 
As though he ever knew 
That I had waited years 
To hear my name 
Once spoken 
As it should have always been 
I'd wait there still 
But someone 
Real appeared 
And stole the heart 
No man could hope to win 
If to my muse 
I'd ever said hello 
It might not hurt this much to say 
Goodbye 
But there is something 
Tragic in this scene 
Which may appear 
As joyous to the eye 
Of anyone who witnesses myself 
Bound in the arms and lips 
Of my new friend 
Completed in a way I've never been 
And healing wounds 
I thought would never mend 
The truth
That shattered my reality 
The soul I dreamed 
But never thought I'd meet 
And now I don't look back 
Except in dreams 
Yet when I do 
The pain 
Is always sweet 
For only pain can show me who I was 
And from that girl to me 
How much I've grown 
I've never tasted tears 
Like these before 
And yes
They are the saddest I have known