Adam Sandler - Cool Guy 5 - Текст песни

-{Sean pulling up in his car to a hooker}-

GIRL #5:  Hey, honey.

SEAN:  S'up baby?  looking all smooth, standing on the corner at 3 in the morning and shit.  You cold, baby?  You want to use me as a blanket?

GIRL #5:  I'm just doing my thing.

SEAN:  Well, does doing your thing mean your tricky?  'Cause I'd like to invest some of my hard earned money towards loving you, if you know what I getting at.

GIRL #5:  Well, how much you got, big man?

SEAN:  Well, I'm willing to drop 50 dollars on your ass, but there's a condition going on.

 

GIRL #5:  What's that?

SEAN:  You're going to have to put those lucious lips of yours on... my... slub-a-dub.

GIRL #5:  Ooh, I can do that.

SEAN:  You can?

GIRL #5:  Mm-hmm.

SEAN:  You mean, you ain't going make fun of the fact that I called my gizza-gazza a "slub-a-dub"?

GIRL #5:  Honey you can call your thing what ever you want to as long as you got 50 bucks.

SEAN:  oh sna-- well, alright then here's the 50 dollars,  -{unzips pants}- and here's my flip stick, now start wetting that thing up.

GIRL #5:  -{Opens his door}- Sir, you are under arrest. 

 -{police car pulls up}-

SEAN:  You got to be fucking with mind here. 

 

GIRL #5:  No, I'm not.

  

COP:  Good job denise.  we'll take him from here.  

-{Cop hand cuffs Sean}-

SEAN:  WHAT?!?! You going to arrest my ass for trying to get a ride on my slip 'n' slide?  Fuck that shit.

GIRL #5:  Hey honey,when you get to jail, you're going to be on the other end of a slip 'n' slide, and I hope you enjoy yourself.  

SEAN:  WWWWHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTT?!?!?!

  -{cop throws sean in back of police car}-

COP:  Just get in the back, asshole.

GIRL #5:  -{from outside}- You sick fuck.

SEAN:  Damn!!  -{crying}- This is a bunch of bullshit!!!

PEEPER: Piss on me.  -{also in the back of the police car}-

SEAN:  WHAT?!

PEEPER:  Please, piss me.

SEAN:  NO!!!

PEEPER:  Just a tinkle.

SEAN:  Fuck that, keep him away from me.

PEEPER:  Urine.

SEAN:  Keep this man away from me.