This is what I had intended, pretending to be drunk A little change in character, pretending to be drunk You think I am weak and feeble, you think I'm a bore When you drag me to a party, soon I'm out the door Next time I'll portray a suave sophisticated hunk That is what I had intended, pretending to be drunk That is what I had intended, pretending to be drunk A bit of "I have lived and loved," I'm pretending to be drunk You say I could use some swagger, you say toughen up I am rigid as a board, you tell me loosen up I'm so loose and I'm so tough that I can barely move That is what I had intended, pretending to be drunk You notice a transformation, pretending to be drunk I've lost all my inhibitions, pretending to be drunk You can take me to the soiree and be proud of me Everyone will be impressed, I'll pass out on your knee Now I am so continental, they think that it's nice Think I'll pretend to be drunk for the rest of my life That is what I had intended, pretending to be drunk
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