Kevin Bloody Wilson
(LITTLE BOY'S VOICE) A Hey Santa Claus you c***! Where's me fucking bike? E A I've unwrapped all this other junk, and there's nothing that I like. A D I wrote you a fucking letter, and I come to see you twice. A E A Ya worn out geriatric fart, you forgot me fucking bike. A If I wanted a pair of bloody thongs, I'd have bloody asked. A E And this cowboy suit and ping pong set, you can shove right up your arse! A You've stuffed me bloody order up. D It's enough to make you spew. A And I'm not the only one who's snakey, E A Me sisters dirty too! (LITTLE GIRL'S VOICE) A Hey Santa Claus you c***! Where's me fucking pram? E A You promised me you'd bring me one, you remember who I am? A D Cause I'm the little girl, who you made sit right on your hand. A I'll give you fucking ho ho ho, E A You forgot me fucking pram. (LITTLE BOY'S VOICE) A Next time I come to see ya, I'm gonna punch you in the guts. E A And I'll let your fucking reindeer go, and kick Rudolf in the nuts! A D You just wait 'till next year, when you go to that store. A And me and me little sister, E A Come stomping through the door. (NC- SPOKEN) And we'll say, yeah you wait for it A Hey mums and dads you smell his breath, and check his bloodshot eyes. E A And don't listen to him boys and girls, 'cause he tells fucking lies. A D He's just a piss tank and a pervert, and he's not even very bright. A Cause the old fucking wanker, E A Forgot me fucking bike. (NC- SPOKEN) You wait you old c***, I'm gonna dob you in. Tell me old man on you, he's gonna punch your fucking lights out. (SING TO FADE) "I saw mummy sucking Santa Claus"