Lord Herefords Knob
Half Man Half Biscuit
E B E As I camped out one evening to take the midnight air A B I heard a maiden grieving from somewhere over there A E A E Who is it you are mourning; for whom do you wear grey? A E F# B7 She said I pine for no one - I just can't pay my way. A E B E Ever since the chattering classes invaded Hebden Bridge A E F# B And priced the likes of me and mine to the pots of the Pennine Ridge A E A E To South East Wales I was forced to flee and now I have no job A B7 E That's why tonight I'm sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob. B E For you I'd waive expenses to try and help you out A B For your beauty influences the landscape hereabouts A E A E Look up my betrothed at Three Cocks; be sure she'll see you right A E F# B7 While I go up to Yorkshire and there avenge your plight. A E B E Soon reports were filtering through to me the pair were drowning in bliss A E F# B I can't recall having ever been cuckolded quite like this A E A I gave up hope ironically for Lent, E A B7 E Come see me living in a bivvie if you're ever up Pen-Y-Ghent. B E Although upon reflection I've been a trifle green A B I still think with affection on everything that's been A E A E So prepare that fatted calf and string up the bunting gay A E F# B7 Your brisk and bonny ploughboy is coming home today. E B E B7 And tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob. E B E B7 Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob. E B On touching the trig point I found my thrill E B To the east Brokeback Mountain, to the west Benny Hill E B I'll give you the grid ref - you might like to go: E B SO2 24350. E B Could this be heaven, would that be the Severn? E B Twampa, Twampa, you're gonna need a jumper, E B E B7 It gets a bit chilly on top of Lord Hereford's Knob. E B E Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob. B7 E All of our songs sound the same; B7 E Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob. B7 E I'm keeping two chevrons apart; B7 E Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob. B7 E You're the reason why paradise lost; B7 E Tonight he'll be sitting on top of Lord Hereford's Knob.